Give it all the blood, tears, sex you’ve got,
if you truly want it.
Bellator ego sum (roughly translated from the Latin for “I am Warrior”) is a collection of over thirty original poems. It was originally published on Blurb.com in August of 2015. The re-release contains new material (including poems that have been posted here).
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It all dissolves like ice cubes at the bottom of a scotch,
Moments, people, places wash from memory with enough time,
The sad and painful past you can’t quite understand –
What drives someone to lose their humanity,
Is it in us all, or is it some sick anomaly?
You’ll never really know, nor is it necessary that you do.
Through agony shines in a blaring light,
The past feeds the present,
And at present you are strong and whole.
Forgive where you can and go on,
Brave as you flow along, steady in the path you chose.
Strange path never tread before.
No certainty except passion.
Running through wilderness.
Feeling anxious, yet eager for the next big adventure.
Running full force into nothing, unafraid.
raised in quicksand, ill-treated, beaten, but never broken.
dreams may take time to materialize, but I’m steadfast,
rejection letters and vanishing editors can’t hold me back.
thankless days spent 9-5,
climbed up out of wreckage for much more than this,
vacations missed to make ends meet,
still I persist.
I’m not done yet.
Red wine passes through my lips, heals the hurt of the day,
this is not to say I recommend you mend all wounds with wine –
Knew a man who couldn’t put down his favorite way to block the pain, died of it.
But this full-bodied cabernet distills my insides,
Keeps work, debt, worry at bay.
So I sip as I sit, and melt away.